Whose hands are your money matters in?

Women and men have very different views on how they manage money. Even in the same relationship, the woman may be convinced they’re working together, while the man is sure that he’s in charge. It’s worth getting to grips with what’s actually going on, or there could be serious problems further down the line.

Women are more likely to say they manage household finances together with their partner. Almost two thirds of women* say they share the job, but among men, this falls to around half. Men are much more likely to say they manage money on their own, without any input from their partner – overall more than a third of men say this and only around a quarter of women do.

Given that statistically most of these women are in relationships with men, these figures aren’t actually possible – the proportion who claim to share the job would have to match. Some of the difference is likely to come down to perception. It may be that women are having money conversations with their partner that make them feel they are coming to a joint decision, while their partner thinks it’s optional to consider their input.

It means it’s worth having a frank conversation about how these decisions are being made, so you both know exactly where you stand. It’s not going to be a comfortable chat, but it’s far better to have it now than to have a horrible surprise later.

Planning together

Even if you both agree on how money management is split between you, it can cause serious problems if one of you looks after the finances alone. The money manager could make mistakes, or prioritise their own objectives at the expense of their partner. In the long run, it could leave one of you completely dependent on the other. And while some couples are happy to manage money this way, others need the independence that comes with having money of their own. Even if the person who is in charge of money matters does a perfect job for both of you, if one of you hands over all financial responsibilities to the other, they need to think about what they’d do if they suddenly found themselves on their own.

Quite aside from the long-term risks, there’s enormous value in planning your finances together. The HL Savings & Resilience Barometer shows that those who plan together tend to be in far better shape financially when it comes to everything from having enough cash left at the end of the month to saving and planning for retirement.

It means it’s worth both you and your partner asking yourself some questions, to check you’re both as on top of your finances as you think. If either of you don’t know the answers, it’s worth finding out.

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